Do you think Busyness means success?

Do you think that Busyness means success? At one point I thought that successful were busy; however, that has changed.

You know how you have those moments in life where you stand still and it as if time has frozen. You look around and see everyone rushing. Cars are flying past, people dash and everyone is frantically tapping their mobiles. In that moment of stillness I wondered what people were rushing towards because there is only one ultimate destination: death. So with that as the destination then why rush?

 

That one epiphany made me think. I sat at my desk watching numerous emails ping into my inbox. I watched a colleague balancing numerous projects and glanced at my manager who was trying to answer emails whilst answering questions on a conference call. Everyone was so busy. It was then I realised how we are conditioned to think that busy-ness is business. Being busy all the time is not success – it is stress. Maybe busyness should be re-named busy-stress. It is ridiculous.

That evening I met up with some of my ex-rowing crew members. These girls are hardcore dedicated athletes. We used to train around 20 hours a week to compete and we all worked full time too. They left the competitive arena of rowing and funnily enough most of them have become endurance sea swimmers. I feel that you may have an idea of their mentality: very focused – work hard, train hard and be very busy. So I raised the busyness issue. Why are we all so busy? I advised them that I craved time to be silent and do nothing and not be with anyone. They were horrified and asked why would I want to spend time alone? My response was ‘because that is how I recharge.’ One of them shook her head sadly and said she hated being alone. In fact she avoided it. She said she trained hard to physical exhaustion and went home and slept. I was stunned and looked at the rest of the group who all agreed. So I had to get it straight – ‘so you are all keeping yourself busy and exhausting yourselves to avoid feeling lonely?’ There was silence and they all nodded. Each explained their stories. Two were in relationships and gave examples of what they did when their partners were away to avoid feeling lonely – usually hold a dinner party or get friends over. I wondered why people assumed that when they were alone they would get lonely. It then occurred to me that our society is over-stimulating us and people actually are not resting through fear of being alone or feeling lonely. That night was quite an insight into ten women’s inner lives.

 

Over the next weeks, something about this lurked in the back of my mind. It was as if something was brewing. So I wondered whether when I was alone for an extended period I would feel lonely. I will be honest I have never even considered that. So I took some time out of my busy schedule and spent four whole days alone and guess what? It was bliss! Ha! Hence less blogs than usual. The plan was not to do, tidy, clean. Instead I was able to just do nothing a duvet day. Of course there was a lot of sleep, meditation and just doing nothing. At times I felt guilty for not being productive. That concerned me – why do I always have to be productive? The thing is in that ‘empty’ time my creative juices flowed. I had times where I was bored and day dreamed and came up with some wonderful ideas to write. It was then that I realised that busyness distracts us from real success. Are you ready for this and this is what I realised – for me – the true success is a feeling of peace and tranquillity whilst feeling connected to the self. When you reach this state you are able to jump into a creative mental pool and have the energy to create/ be productive rather than forcing. In addition in this state one radiates and feels happy. Imagine. So my lovelies my new attitude is do less but strangely achieve more. I hope this inspires

You can find my books at the following link: Ruby Allure books on Audible:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

AUDIBLE BOOK AVAILABLE HERE:

LINK TO BUY ON AUDIBLE:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Self-Development/A-Short-Course-In-Creative-Writing-Audiobook/B012OVUKE8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1443260320&sr=1-1

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A Short Course in Creative Writing
by Ms Ruby Allure
Link: http://amzn.com/1517234832

THE LINK TO THE OCEAN CALLINGS: http://www.audible.com/pd/Sci-Fi-Fantasy/The-Ocean-Callings-Audiobook/B01C4OOOEW/

Synchronicity... Life Really Is Fascinating...

Have you ever had one of those moments where you literally step into the 'flow' of life? Where the strangest things happen in perfect timing. You say something and then a few seconds later what you have said appears before your eyes? The long weekend has been like that for me. A couple of my friends were literally astounded. I was walking along with two friends talking about Glasgow in Scotland, that is 456 miles from where I live. A second later a Glasweigen chap walked past and started playing the guitar as he walked backwards. He sang about being a Glasweigen, took a bow and then toddled off. There were no other people around my friends and I at the time. We could not believe it and laughed so hard because it was so surreal.

Well the weekend continued in this manner: I mentioned to my brother that I wondered whether my bestfriend was back from holiday and a second later she text. He just looked bemused because I had just mention the synchronicity conversation too. I also have a chap at work who I have a laugh with. We think we are living in the Truman show. He works in a different department and basically no matter what time I decide to go for a break or lunch I will physically collide with him. We find it bizarre and hilarious. We have decided we have psychic bladders. Well I was telling my two friends about this situation and one of them said well next you will see him out of work... After I left my friends I was on the way back to my car and stopped off at a coffee shop. As I left the coffee shop - yes you guessed it - I collided with him. We could not believe it and found it astounding. I said I am going to have to check behind me all the time from now on.






Of course these situations got me thinking because a lot of years ago I wrote a book (Labyrinthine) about synchronicity and timings. An androgenous being called a 'Connector' linked timings for people's lives and their fate. Unfortunately people started using their will to defy death, which caused tremors in the field. Those death defying people created numerous repercussions for other people's lives. This book came out on audio this year and one reviewer gave it a 1 star rating which did not do much for sales, as you can imagine.  After that I accepted that maybe people were not into synchronicity and that synchronicity itself did not want the world to read about it. I accepted defeat, did not take it personally and carried on writing my next books. Over the last year I did not think that much about synchronicity. Instead I had been heavily involved in work and 'making' things happen with my books. I was 'forcing' and 'willing'. I don't know about you but I am impatient and want everything now. This whole allowing things to unfold actually bored me... I know - naughty. I just don't see the point of waiting around for things to take place. Instead I prefer to go out there and get them.

HERE IS THE LINK TO LABYRINTHINE ON AUDIO. If you want to read a really rubbish review then please enjoy it: http://www.audible.com/pd/Sci-Fi-Fantasy/Labyrinthine-Audiobook/B011MZKFF6/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1459194665&sr=1-1#publisher-summary  

 

The above all ties in with a conversation I had with one of my friends on Friday. She is quite wafty and very 'connected' to life. She is amazing at creating things without even trying. She said to me that I was constantly planting seeds and digging them back up to see if they were growing. Admittedly she is right. She said it is time to just leave the seeds to germinate and allow life to show you when you are in the flow.... And guess what? This weekend was filled with all the lovely things that she talked about. However, the question arises then if these things just come to you - then why do you need to do anything?

If you have any answers I will be interested to hear your perspective:)

You can find my books at the following link: Ruby Allure books on Audible:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

AUDIBLE BOOK AVAILABLE HERE:

LINK TO BUY ON AUDIBLE:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Self-Development/A-Short-Course-In-Creative-Writing-Audiobook/B012OVUKE8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1443260320&sr=1-1

LINK TO PAPERBACK ON AMAZON.COM

A Short Course in Creative Writing
by Ms Ruby Allure
Link: http://amzn.com/1517234832

THE LINK TO THE OCEAN CALLINGS: http://www.audible.com/pd/Sci-Fi-Fantasy/The-Ocean-Callings-Audiobook/B01C4OOOEW/

What Happens When You Reach Your Goals?

What do you do when you reach your goal? Do you dance? Do you celebrate? Or do you do what most people do - and set another goal? What is the point of setting yourself a challenge unless you get some satisfaction from it? It is funny that I write this now because I was recently having a discussion about this subject. Many of my friends who are athletes feel lost without a goal or a challenge. They say that when they have a goal / event they will push themselves beyond their comfort zone and go on a journey to better themselves. In some cases they are able to reach their true limits and see what they are truly capable of.

With regards to the goals you need to have a reason or a motivation - it becomes your why. When I have competed at rowing my why used to be the medal and the unity of a team. That amazing feeling of crossing the line and winning. Now, and this may be maturity, my rowing has taken on a completely new form. The love for rowing and my new 'why' in rowing is precision in stroke and mastering unity within a team. I don't actually care about the win because we have won and had the small moments of elation. That elation was short lived and resulted in the next goal or race; whereas now the rowing enables concentrated focus with sustained feelings of elation. What is even more satisfying is  rowing at your best ability for a continued time period. Maybe this is another goal or a form of goal, yet what do you do when you have reached all your goals? Is life a continual chase of goal acquisition or could you be without a goal? Does being goal-less become the goal in itself?

Success is a strange phenomenon. We are fed so many messages to go out there and achieve. To set huge goals of money, experience, career or beauty. Yet maybe it is more about the journey and who we become through our challenges. Maybe that is where we need to focus rather than goal after goal after goal. After all, doesn't life happen between goals?  Why are people so scared of not chasing something to be better?

So my question still remains: What happens when you reach your goals? What do you do when you have achieved all that you have ever wanted to achieve? Is this the time where you find satisfaction in existence and just be? Is that why goals have been so important? Is it the fear of essentially just being and existing?

You can find my books at the following link: Ruby Allure books on Audible:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

AUDIBLE BOOK AVAILABLE HERE:

 

LINK TO BUY ON AUDIBLE:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Self-Development/A-Short-Course-In-Creative-Writing-Audiobook/B012OVUKE8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1443260320&sr=1-1

 

LINK TO PAPERBACK ON AMAZON.COM

A Short Course in Creative Writing
by Ms Ruby Allure
Link: http://amzn.com/1517234832

THE LINK TO THE OCEAN CALLINGS: http://www.audible.com/pd/Sci-Fi-Fantasy/The-Ocean-Callings-Audiobook/B01C4OOOEW/

First Review on The Ocean Callings

http://www.audible.com/pd/Sci-Fi-Fantasy/The-Ocean-Callings-Audiobook/B01C4OOOEW/

A very creative book. Great imagination., February 21, 2016

By 

LMS#YOM - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Ocean Callings (Kindle Edition)

This author not only has a very vivid imagination but also the wonderful ability to be able to transfer her thoughts in such a simplistic way onto the page that the readers are very quickly involved in the storyline.

Set it in a small coastal town in Scotland you enjoy the sights, sounds and scenes not only set out on land, but also above and below the sea. You are taken on a mystical journey which is filled with a mixture of humorous, tense and sometimes scary moments. You soon warm to the characters of the book; the old-fashioned tight-knit network of the local community, and the modern banter and pranks from the younger new residents to the area.

This book allows the reader to escape reality but then realise that in life there are always consequences from decisions and actions we take. I found it to be funny, gripping, and warm-hearted. A good read.

THE LINK TO THE OCEAN CALLINGS: http://www.audible.com/pd/Sci-Fi-Fantasy/The-Ocean-Callings-Audiobook/B01C4OOOEW/

Why Master the Mundane?

Why Master the Mundane?

Is there something wrong with ordinary or mundane? If so why is that? Why does everything have to be spectacular, amazing or phenomenal? In this world of ‘instant’ there is the constant need for stimulus. That endless search for stimulation overrides the gentle moments that take place in the ordinary. In the meantime our endeavours need to be posted for the world to see them. The validation comes from likes and external sources. Wow! So you want to spend your next eighty years in that constant motion with the need for people to like pictures of the next spectacular thing that has been done. We must be aware that we are conditioned by society yet one of the subliminal messages suggests we should always be working and aspiring. There are a couple of clever catch phrases you may recognise ‘you can be anything if you have…’ and ‘treat yourself.’ This is all consumerist propaganda to make you buy pointless items to keep an economy in motion.  Of course being satisfied and content does not make you buy.

You may wonder where this has come from. Well one of my big things to understand this year is contentment and satisfaction. On the journey to satisfaction, over the last couple of weeks I have been on couple of meditation retreats. It had a rather profound affect. When you remove all the external expectations you have space and time to reflect. In that time of reflection it became apparent how fast life is. Without the constant bombardment of advertising there is time to appreciate yourself and be with who you really are. It was during this time I recognised the ordinary. I know, I had been so busy with work, aspirations and writing that I had not noticed the ordinary. In the quiet time I saw that the mundane was actually beautiful. I realised the underlying issue was that the mundane became boring because I was over-stimulated. The irony is that wherever you are, it is you that you that you are taking to the situation. So by enjoying the meditation and being in deep relaxation my perspective shifted. No matter where I was, depending on my inner state, determined how I responded. Now imagine you are in a peaceful tranquil state experiencing life rather than in a fast state of inner anxiety. It is funny how your inner state completely changes everything. Since the retreat I have been amused by my work environment, which at times falls into utter chaos. When my state was internal chaos the situations would make me stressed. Now that I am doing the regular meditation, the situations that erupt no longer affect me in the same way and I now can see calm and effortless solutions. In addition, I can now fully experience the situations rather than ‘get them done’ and move onto the next random event. Of course it is early days; however, the endless need to aspire, chase and be fast is something we all become caught up in. It is as if everyone is trying to out busy each other through fear of not appearing to live an exciting life. Everyone is rushing but where to? Death?

Have you realised the big secret that the economic world does not what you to know? The best experiences are with friends, family and take place in the quiet moments between chasing ideals. When you realise this you then wonder why you bother chasing. When you step into your stillness and experience each day for that day you open up a whole universe of beauty in the mundane. That is why, in my opinion, it is worth mastering the Mundane.

 

You can find my books at the following link: Ruby Allure books on Audible:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

AUDIBLE BOOK AVAILABLE HERE:

 

LINK TO BUY ON AUDIBLE:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Self-Development/A-Short-Course-In-Creative-Writing-Audiobook/B012OVUKE8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1443260320&sr=1-1

 

LINK TO PAPERBACK ON AMAZON.COM

A Short Course in Creative Writing
by Ms Ruby Allure
Link: http://amzn.com/1517234832

Why do you do what you do?

So this week has been another fascinating week because I have been re-evaluating my motivations for doing what I do. Why on earth would anyone spend hours of their life writing books and posting blogs if it wasn't for money? And that is it... That is why people think that I am bizarre - I don't write to make money. I write because I love writing and that is where the intrinsic and the extrinsic values come in. The extrinsic are the values applied to having a feedback or a response. The intrinsic are the internal values where you simply enjoy a task for creativity or the act of doing it. When my books sell I am excited that someone has the opportunity to share an inner landscape with me.

So let me ask you why do you do what you do? Do you do things because there is money or approval involved? What is it that makes you more happy:doing something for money or simply because you enjoy it? Isn't there a pleasure in simply enjoying a creative process and creating something you are proud off? If you fancy sharing that creation then it is out there for others to enjoy. I admit in years gone by I had those heady illusions of becoming the next J.K. Rowling, most writers do. One has to have a dream and have a fantasy or a delusion every so often. Mine can be somewhat frequent and we won't go into the one about doing a headstand on a paddle-board (I am actually working on that).

So let me ask you honestly: does doing something for money and approval make you happier than when you do something just for the sake of doing it?

Let's consider baking a cake - don't you do that because you love it or have a cakey urge? I would guess you like creating it and then sharing it.  How does that change when the financial dynamic comes in? Will you only make a cake if money is given to you? It is strange how society has developed that something only has worth if you make money from it. Yet you can't make money from being happy. Isn't happiness worth more?

The whole doing something purely to make money is a hard lesson I learned in my late twenties when I had my own photography business - I lost my love of photography because I had to make money from it. I had to take on work that I did not love and spend hours making photographs that I did not enjoy making. When you have been in that situation for a few years then something shifts - you realise that you work in something you enjoy to earn money whilst keeping your passion on the side because you enjoy it.

Admittedly there are people who make money from their passion and I celebrate them. Yet for me when money was assigned to creativity it became like mental constipation. I was having to mentally force rather than simply enjoy a creative release. I wanted to spend my time creating the books that I loved and explore the stories I desired to write. Now the irony about all this is that my books do make an income; however, they were already created and the income is a by-product from doing what I love.

With all of this in mind: what is it that really motivates you to do what you do?

My audio books can be found here: http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_mn_mt_ano_tseft__galileo?advsearchKeywords=ruby+allure&x=0&y=0