Ruby Allure's Books

Ruby Allure's Books
Ruby Allure's Books
Showing posts with label happiness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label happiness. Show all posts

Thursday, 8 September 2016

Embracing Uncertainty

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Who here likes to have their life in order? Who likes to know what is happening and live in a routine? Who here likes to feel safe? So what happens when all your safety lines are removed and you have to live each day and not know what is coming next? So how do you do you deal with uncertainty?
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I asked the 'uncertain' question to a variety of friends of different backgrounds. Their answers were fascinating because many of them are late thirties and mid-forties and there were common themes amongst them. Those in their mid-forties were more likely to say you have to trust and let things pan out. Those in their thirties were less relaxed and said they get anxious and frustrated. Some had been given medication to alleviate the nervousness. After having a few conversations about the subject, I had a lovely moment of serendipity where this quote arrived:

Depression comes from living in the past.
Anxiety comes from living in the future.
Peace comes from living in the now.


I had not thought about life in that way; however, I realised that the only day guaranteed is today. I had spent so much time planning for the future and that future never quite turned out how I expected. If peace resides in the now then you can only really live your optimum now. So that question made me think then what is it I want to feel in a day? What is it I want to experience? It is questions like these that lead you into a warren of thoughts and ideals and then I realised - it was simple...



I want to experience Joy, Happiness, Fun and Love.

So rather than go out onto the streets and happy-hug random people, I took to meditating on these feelings in the morning. Try asking yourself what does it truly feel like to feel joy and allow yourself to feel it. This little revelation came from a network spinal analysis practitioner who I was on holiday with recently. She literally said try just feeling the emotions you wish to feel. They are all just sitting inside.


So back to the uncertainty... How does this relate? Uncertainty is life, that is a fact. We are under the impression that life is under our command; however, I have certainly learned lately that life has its own little plan which seems to be a little different from my own. The more I try to control and make it what I think it should be, the more life prizes my fingers from what I cling to and throws me into free-fall. So with that in mind, maybe the lesson is learning to embrace uncertainty. In Indiana Jones there is a bridge of faith. As he steps forward the bridge forms itself. He had to trust that he was not going to descend into a huge ravine. To embrace uncertainty one has to trust, allow and enjoy the present moment. That way you become open to all opportunities and intuition. What a lovely learning from someone who always wanted things in order...


Enjoy my audio books at the following link:




Thursday, 25 August 2016

How Do You Deal With Change?

Today I was sitting in the dental hygienist's chair. We were discussing change. Well actually she was discussing change while my cheek was being sucked by one of those sucky machines. Anyway she has been my hygienist for years. While my mouth was hoovered she said that she really did not like change. She remained thoughtful as she toured my mouth and said who really likes change?

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As I left, with my teeth gleaming, the question rattled around my mind. Who really likes change? Well it occurred to me that life is change. Seasons change, people wander into your life and others leave. So the capacity to do the same thing over and over again is actually going against nature. Yes routine is nice, but life is bigger than repeating the same thing over and over again. For me, the best times in life have involved adventure and the unknown. It was exciting not knowing what was going to happen next. The times I felt stagnant was when I simply stayed doing the same thing because I knew it was easy and safe.
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At the moment I am in a state of forced change. I am moving into a new career with completely new people and new 'rules'. That change makes for anxiety; however, I have always found that change is usually a relief and something better often develops. When I have moved houses, as an example, I found that change resulted in a much more beautiful home. When I have changed jobs it is usually the 'right' time and the change and the freshness is exciting.

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This then makes me ask- how do you deal with change? Do you dig your heals in or view it as opportunity? In the blogs, I often reference our limited time on earth and surely we all want to experience as much as possible. By staying doing the same thing and being safe - what are you doing? Erm staying safe until you die? When you think of it like that then what change can you enjoy? What little changes could you make? When have you made a change and felt the benefit? No all change has to be scary. So with all that in mind, maybe change is something not to be feared but embraced. The flow of life is about adapting and going with it... Aren't you curious what might happen if you allowed life to bring positive change?
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ELORA, THE ONE WINGED FAIRY AND THE LAST BABY GIGGLE LINK:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Elora-One-Winged-Fairy-Last-Giggle-ebook/dp/B01KYHM1G4/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1472123774&sr=8-1&keywords=Elora+the+one+winged+fairy

A fantasy fairy fiction novel for girls aged 8 and older...



Saturday, 13 August 2016

How Can You Be The Best FOR The World?

How Can You Be The Best For The World?


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How can you be the best for the world? Well, someone recently asked me this question and it sent me into a wonderful thought spiral because don't most people want to be the best in the world? So what is the difference? One is about contribution and the other is about ego. Or is it? That is up to you to determine. The next question that then came to mind is what is it that you want to contribute to be the best for the world...
What are your unique skills and talents? What can you give to the world? What will make a difference?
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What can you 'give' is fascinating because so many people do not know what their skills or talents are because they are so natural and easy for them. Take for example a friend of mine who teaches yoga, she had no idea it was a talent, she said it was simply something that she liked doing. Without realising it she is being her best for the world by sharing her yoga talent and inspiring others to find peace and bendiness. What about if you have a job that you simply choose to be your best in and positively up lift others. By choosing to give your best you are actively being the best for the world. What about people who are great at giving hugs? The more they hug people (who want it - otherwise it could be awkward...) the more they connect to others which may be all that someone needs. Or those who love, really love demonstrating love to the world. There is so much possibility.
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To be the best for the world find what you love doing. What comes naturally to you? What makes you feel alive? How can you positively share and affect others?

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I personally spent time considering this and realised that I love writing blogs, writing books and thinking a lot about a lot of things... Have you noticed? I would do what I do whether I make money from it or not. So that in itself is a little bit of a reveal about a talent. What would you spend your time doing even if you did not get paid for it?
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So how can you be the best you can be for the world? Look at what you love doing, spend time doing it and then share it. Your happiness, joy and passion will positively affect others. We then have a positive chain reaction. Isn't that a beautiful thought?

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Enjoy my audio books at the following link:







Saturday, 4 June 2016

The Grass isn't always Greener on the Other Side!


The grass isn’t always greener on the other side!


If the grass looks greener on the other side then start tending to your own grass until it is vibrant and filled with radiance!  Why are you looking at other people's grass anyway when your attention could be focused on making yours amazing!


This week has been quite a week for me. Two children’s books released and snapped up by audio producers, a return to work after being signed off with Deep Vein Thrombosis and being able to see the world with a new perspective. It is funny how when you are immersed in routine that you live on automatic pilot. How often do you stop to take in your surroundings? How often do you stop and say actually I am living the perfect life for me? I would guess that it isn’t that often. Don’t you find it amazing that all your choices and decisions in life have resulted in where you are now? Those decisions must have been made because you felt your situation would improve… Am I correct? So why do people look at other people’s lives and wish they were them? Or wish they had their life? Why do we assume that life is greener on the other side?



A good example of the grass being greener was when I was at a rowing championship. I was staying in a cottage with a group of mothers (who were there for their children). They said to me they wished they could live my life: a life of freedom, creativity and working in business. I had never considered that people would look at my lifestyle from the outside and consider my grass was greener. I pointed out that in my opinion they had it pretty good. They all had wonderful husbands who provided for them and they had a family, lovely homes and all they needed. They had not had to work up a corporate ladder or find ways to enable numerous incomes. Instead they had had the opportunity to focus on nurture, bringing life into the world and they had the opportunity to do that in comfort rather than struggle. I had struggled, seriously struggled and there were times where I would have gladly been saved by an opportune prince. Unfortunately there was no prince making that showy arrival, so instead I realised my life was my responsibility and rather than waste time admiring people’s grass and wishing it was mine, I thought well how do I make my grass the greenest it can be? Since each person’s life is their responsibility and their grass state is representational of their life, then tending to one’s own grass is the best thing a person can do.



At this point I would like you to ask how you make your grass as green as it can be?  The thing is it isn’t just about having more or earning more money, it can quite simply be a shift of mental perspective. Just think that there are people out there who aspire to have the life you have. I know… It is a strange thought. The way I see it is if you have access to the internet and have the opportunity to read this blog then you are rich. You have the capacity to purchase the technology to be able to access the world. You have the funds to buy the tools. You are not sitting in a hovel digging through shit.

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Through doing this evaluation, I realised that my life was good and worked perfectly for me. As much as those images of people living in huge luxurious mansions bombard us, I realised that actually I would feel very lonely residing in such a huge space. I would be like a pea rattling around a warehouse. My little apartment is perfect for me. It is peaceful, cosy and filled with an air of femininity. In truth it is beautiful, has turrets and is minimalist. So you might wave a mansion at me and I would smile and know that in terms of where I live my grass is very green.


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It was a few years ago now that I saw through the big illusion. That illusion is fascinating – we are fed images of ideals in films and adverts. They are not real. We are shown images of the ideal bodies, yet we are all different. So why not love the body you have and treat it well? Don’t starve it, treat it to great nutrition and it is worth shifting perspective to consider food as medicine and building blocks for the body.  Find an exercise you love so that your body radiates with health. Blood moving around the body stops it stagnating. Finally money – we all chase money to be rich because everyone else wants to be rich. Yes money is a decorated piece of paper to accumulate but what if all that effort to accumulate results in devaluation? It happened to Cyprus and Iceland. So with that in mind, you can realise that actually what you want is the feeling of being rich and that comes from appreciating what you have. It is so simple.



The moment I realised I was rich was quite out of the blue. I stood on my paddleboard on a beautiful expanse of water. It was close to sunset and the clouds were decorated with pink and the reflection made heaven and earth one. I stood there in that moment and thought I couldn’t pay for this. This endless chase for money is ridiculous because it is continuous. When will you ever have enough? You know the answer to that... For me - beauty and true wealth comes from being immersed in the experience.
That moment on the paddleboard was when I realised I had stopped to smell the roses and seen the beauty in life. That beauty had not cost a thing – it was nature working its daily miracles. What was it that made me rich? It was the recognition and the feeling of a great connection with the planet. A feeling of great wealth rose up inside me. I series of pictures connected, as if there was a thread throughout my life. I saw the sequence of great moments of inspiration. It was then that I realised that my grass was as green as I wished to make it. I just needed to focus on the feeling of being wealthy with what I have because I have access to that whenever I wish. I also realised that the grass is not necessarily greener on the other side. Instead it is far better to focus on my own grass, tend to my own grass and then take it with me in the form of radiant turf!

I hope this inspires


NEW RELEASE: TINGLE DINGLE AND THE LITTLE MISCHIEFS

NEW RELEASE: THE HAIRY-LEGGED MYSTERY