Committing Career Suicide

Life is funny how it can throw you some fantastic dilemmas. In comparison to many people my dilemma isn't that bad, in fact it is lovely. The question is: do I or don't I commit career suicide? For those who follow my blogs, you will be aware that I usually work as a business analyst and innovator and then in my spare time enjoy writing books and blogs. The books are my creative release, so they will continue being written because writing is a compulsion. I can't not do it.

So here is the dilemma:
I have taken the opportunity for redundancy - great. Now the world is now full of possibility. I finished work last week and this week I have been invited to return to cruise ships to work on board in a writing capacity. It sounds fantastic; however, it will involve working ten hour days, seven days a week for four months in a row. What's more the money isn't very good. I can cover my mortgage and live relatively frugally and circumnavigate the world. The thing with writing all the time is that you don't have a lot left for your own creative writing. Of course everything on board is taken care of. I have worked on ships for years previously and enjoyed it. The reason I returned to 'real life' was because one of the ships I was working on almost sunk in Antarctica. That potential catastrophe made me re-evaluate existence and return to land to live a 'safe-ish' life. Of course the week I returned I managed to cycle in a swarm of twenty thousand bees. Yep! That is apparently the safe life! Over the last twelve years I have to admit writing became my escape from the mundane and boredom of corporate culture.

Taking to the seas again provides wonderful potential for adventure while working in a creative writing capacity. It seems like a wonderful dream; although the reality of being on board is entirely different.  At the same day I have been approached to work in Germany for 5 months as a business analyst earning huge money using my skills as a business analyst, innovator and project manager. Following that I was then called up and asked by a company to work in London on a huge innovation financial project - big money and lots of stress. Finally another local project role approached - easy to get to and could be a little dull. Isn't it nice to be in demand... Of course I am still waiting for the right one to land and nothing is definite yet. Of course these sequence of events got me thinking and asking questions. The thing is this is life and what do you want to say when you are on your death-bed: yes I earned loads of money or I experienced every day fully and saw the world? I am lucky because I am free to follow any route because I have no commitments. That is why I am so tempted to commit the career suicide and just go and travel again. The inspiration, the potential blogs and the idea of the experience thrills me. The thing is when you work four months on and two months off you can focus completely on writing during your leave time... So you may not think this is a dilemma, the thing is by stepping away from business analysis is like committing career suicide. By not living fully one is committing another type of spiritual death.

In addition to all of this, Elora, The One-Winged Fairy - The Last Baby Giggle has completed audio production by Lisa Hicks and is in its evaluation and approval phase. So that is exciting and I have been having a strong desire to write the follow up to Money Farm (the brave new world of finance). You know what? It is as if the universe has taken a laxative... So the question is what would you do? Commit career suicide or follow the path of financial increase combined with the mundane?

Enjoy my audio books at the following link:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

http://www.audible.com/pd/Fiction/Money-Farm-Audiobook/B010BOM9A8/ref=a_search_c4_1_2_srTtl?qid=1471072677&sr=1-2

 

AUDIO LINK: http://www.audible.com/pd/Kids/The-Hairy-Legged-Mystery-Audiobook/B01H2HF0XU/ref=a_search_c4_1_2_srTtl?qid=1471619538&sr=1-2

ELORA, THE ONE WINGED FAIRY AND THE LAST BABY GIGGLE LINK:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Elora-One-Winged-Fairy-Last-Giggle-ebook/dp/B01KYHM1G4/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1472123774&sr=8-1&keywords=Elora+the+one+winged+fairy

A fantasy fairy fiction novel for girls aged 8 and older...

How Do You Deal With Change?

Today I was sitting in the dental hygienist's chair. We were discussing change. Well actually she was discussing change while my cheek was being sucked by one of those sucky machines. Anyway she has been my hygienist for years. While my mouth was hoovered she said that she really did not like change. She remained thoughtful as she toured my mouth and said who really likes change?

As I left, with my teeth gleaming, the question rattled around my mind. Who really likes change? Well it occurred to me that life is change. Seasons change, people wander into your life and others leave. So the capacity to do the same thing over and over again is actually going against nature. Yes routine is nice, but life is bigger than repeating the same thing over and over again. For me, the best times in life have involved adventure and the unknown. It was exciting not knowing what was going to happen next. The times I felt stagnant was when I simply stayed doing the same thing because I knew it was easy and safe.

At the moment I am in a state of forced change. I am moving into a new career with completely new people and new 'rules'. That change makes for anxiety; however, I have always found that change is usually a relief and something better often develops. When I have moved houses, as an example, I found that change resulted in a much more beautiful home. When I have changed jobs it is usually the 'right' time and the change and the freshness is exciting.

This then makes me ask- how do you deal with change? Do you dig your heals in or view it as opportunity? In the blogs, I often reference our limited time on earth and surely we all want to experience as much as possible. By staying doing the same thing and being safe - what are you doing? Erm staying safe until you die? When you think of it like that then what change can you enjoy? What little changes could you make? When have you made a change and felt the benefit? No all change has to be scary. So with all that in mind, maybe change is something not to be feared but embraced. The flow of life is about adapting and going with it... Aren't you curious what might happen if you allowed life to bring positive change?

ELORA, THE ONE WINGED FAIRY AND THE LAST BABY GIGGLE LINK:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Elora-One-Winged-Fairy-Last-Giggle-ebook/dp/B01KYHM1G4/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1472123774&sr=8-1&keywords=Elora+the+one+winged+fairy

A fantasy fairy fiction novel for girls aged 8 and older...

Can having your legs waxed wipe out the electricity in a remote Sri Lankan village?

Can having your legs waxed wipe out the electricity in a remote Sri Lankan village?

One of my great friends is convinced that I got the inspiration for one of my more recent children's books from a leg waxing experience. In fact, she announced on the train that while we were in Sri Lanka that my leg wax caused a static burst that destroyed the electricity connections across a village... She said I was 'The Hairy-Legged Mystery!'

As with all myths, this one started when I looked at my 'holiday' legs and thought they needed a wax. That afternoon, while we were travelling on  a Sri Lankan train, my friend frowned at me and said 'I think those hairy-bad-boys need a wax'. She pointed at my legs rather than any other part of my body. So after travelling across Sri Lanka by train, we came to a lovely village in the mountains. It was here we found a beauty salon that had a rather good waxing menu. So while I volunteered myself for a hair-ripping experience, my great friend negotiated a rather large gin in a giant jar. She was happy to say the least and I knew, being that she was a laughter therapist, that the bar was going to be in laughaceous uproar by the time I returned.

That evening I dubiously I crossed the road and my friend waved with a huge smirk on her face and a jar of gin in her hand. She knew I hated waxing but it was necessary. Legs that resembled cousin IT, from the Adam's family was not attractive and resulted in some terrible tan lines. What's more a hairy halo around one's legs was drawing some rather curious looks from the locals.

So there I am with two lovely Sri Lankan beauticians concealing their hairy horror. The wax was applied and Rrrrip! All the village lights went out. In complete darkness I wondered whether the hair on ones' legs could create an enormous static burst... Who was I to deny the fact that the timing was immaculate? Could one quantum hair destroy a planet? Could a hairy-legged entanglement wipe out a village electricity? 'Oh madam,' said one of the beauticians. The pair proceeded to shine their mobile torches and continued with the hair-ripping escapades.

When I was smooth-legged I returned to the bar which was lit by candles and my friend had in fact befriended at least thirty people. She was hysterical because she had been watching me lie on the beauty bench and had awaited the wax. When the lights went out with the first rip she fell about in hysterics. She said I was the only person she knew who could wipe out a remote villages' electricity with one wax strip! With that little experience in mind is it any wonder that unconsciously I wrote a book called 'The Hairy-Legged Mystery?' What is strange for me is that little event had slipped my mind because I have since experienced other rather funny events. The thing is the new cover has been sent through... And when I showed it to my friend she fell about laughing. She said that the image reminded her of Sri Lanka and how my legs looked prior to waxing.. Well we all get inspiration from somewhere! So The Hairy-Legged mystery creation myth can now be related to a remote village having a complete static burst from one pair of hairy legs!

LINK TO THE HAIRY LEGGED MYSTERY:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Kids/The-Hairy-Legged-Mystery-Audiobook/B01H2HF0XU/ref=a_search_c4_1_2_srTtl?qid=1471619538&sr=1-2

When things don't go quite so smoothly...

When Things Don't Go Quite So Smoothly...

When we hit the metal gate with two kayaks on the roof and listened to the screech of metal being ripped from the roof of my friends' car, I came to the conclusion that random events happen to everyone and not just me. What made it all the more bizarre was that she continued to drive forwards even though we were snagged. When it happened we were in mid-conversation so she just kept going. The thing is people's lives are complex and the most random things happen and it is how we react to them that certainly reveals where a person is in their lives. This little even happened because a group of us were going paddle-boarding and kayaking up a river. My friend and I would usually be on inflatable paddleboards that are stored in the car. It seemed that my friend actually forgot that she had kayaks on her roof and continued to drive when we came up against the barrier. That in itself is a little insight - continuing to drive even though you reach a barrier...

This last few weeks I have been writing a book about paddle-boarding and loving writing it because so many insights come from some of the situations I find myself in when floating on the sea. Take for example the other morning. I had been paddling for hours, completely relaxed and in gentle waves. I then glanced down to see the hugest jelly fish. It was beautiful. In response a jolt of adrenaline shot through me and I prepared to fight or flight. Of course when you go rigid on your board you then become unstable - somewhat like life. I quickly caught my reaction and was like hang on.. You have been paddling for two hours and not even thought about falling in and then one blooming big jelly fish and you become all wobbly - jellified actually. It then occurred to me that we all have incidents in life where surprise jelly fish turn up or there is a collision and in that moment how do we react? At first the jelly fish threw me into instincts and fear... That made me rigid and potentially would throw me in. Yet when I relaxed and rationalised I realised there was no need to fear. Can we apply this way of thinking to life?

So back to the kayak situation - the two kayaks flew backwards off the car and smashed on the ground. The roof-rack was ripped from the roof and smashed down too. So how do you think my friend reacted? She quickly climbed out of the car checked the kayaks were okay and shrugged. 'It's done now.' With that we got the tool box out, mended the roof rack, moved the kayaks and decided to paddle and have a lovely time. That one situation could have escalated into a tandrum-filled drama but it didn't because my friend was in a space where she was relaxed. So this has played on my mind today... It is quite a lovely thing to play on my mind - how we react and how we affect ourselves through those reactions. So say she had grown angry or frustrated then what would have happened? How would that have improved the situation. The situation happened and that was it, so what is it that in our inner worlds that makes a person launch into an absolute break-down when things don't go so smoothly. What if in those moments of fear, aggravation or anguish, we simply stopped and said - you know what it happened now. Let's do something to make it right and not carry the burden of the situation. What about if something rubbish happens you simply say it's done - let's still go and have a nice time.

The thing is that simple situation could have ruined everyone's paddling fun but it didn't we simply had a gorgeous time gliding up and down the river on kayaks and paddleboards. For me that is the joy of it... The beauty and pleasure of being on water, out in nature and with people who simply get on with it when things don't go so smoothly!

Enjoy my books at the following link:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

AUDIBLE LINK: http://www.audible.com/pd/Fiction/Money-Farm-Audiobook/B010BOM9A8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1467218674&sr=1-1

Synchronicity... Life Really Is Fascinating...

Have you ever had one of those moments where you literally step into the 'flow' of life? Where the strangest things happen in perfect timing. You say something and then a few seconds later what you have said appears before your eyes? The long weekend has been like that for me. A couple of my friends were literally astounded. I was walking along with two friends talking about Glasgow in Scotland, that is 456 miles from where I live. A second later a Glasweigen chap walked past and started playing the guitar as he walked backwards. He sang about being a Glasweigen, took a bow and then toddled off. There were no other people around my friends and I at the time. We could not believe it and laughed so hard because it was so surreal.

Well the weekend continued in this manner: I mentioned to my brother that I wondered whether my bestfriend was back from holiday and a second later she text. He just looked bemused because I had just mention the synchronicity conversation too. I also have a chap at work who I have a laugh with. We think we are living in the Truman show. He works in a different department and basically no matter what time I decide to go for a break or lunch I will physically collide with him. We find it bizarre and hilarious. We have decided we have psychic bladders. Well I was telling my two friends about this situation and one of them said well next you will see him out of work... After I left my friends I was on the way back to my car and stopped off at a coffee shop. As I left the coffee shop - yes you guessed it - I collided with him. We could not believe it and found it astounding. I said I am going to have to check behind me all the time from now on.






Of course these situations got me thinking because a lot of years ago I wrote a book (Labyrinthine) about synchronicity and timings. An androgenous being called a 'Connector' linked timings for people's lives and their fate. Unfortunately people started using their will to defy death, which caused tremors in the field. Those death defying people created numerous repercussions for other people's lives. This book came out on audio this year and one reviewer gave it a 1 star rating which did not do much for sales, as you can imagine.  After that I accepted that maybe people were not into synchronicity and that synchronicity itself did not want the world to read about it. I accepted defeat, did not take it personally and carried on writing my next books. Over the last year I did not think that much about synchronicity. Instead I had been heavily involved in work and 'making' things happen with my books. I was 'forcing' and 'willing'. I don't know about you but I am impatient and want everything now. This whole allowing things to unfold actually bored me... I know - naughty. I just don't see the point of waiting around for things to take place. Instead I prefer to go out there and get them.

HERE IS THE LINK TO LABYRINTHINE ON AUDIO. If you want to read a really rubbish review then please enjoy it: http://www.audible.com/pd/Sci-Fi-Fantasy/Labyrinthine-Audiobook/B011MZKFF6/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1459194665&sr=1-1#publisher-summary  

 

The above all ties in with a conversation I had with one of my friends on Friday. She is quite wafty and very 'connected' to life. She is amazing at creating things without even trying. She said to me that I was constantly planting seeds and digging them back up to see if they were growing. Admittedly she is right. She said it is time to just leave the seeds to germinate and allow life to show you when you are in the flow.... And guess what? This weekend was filled with all the lovely things that she talked about. However, the question arises then if these things just come to you - then why do you need to do anything?

If you have any answers I will be interested to hear your perspective:)

You can find my books at the following link: Ruby Allure books on Audible:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

AUDIBLE BOOK AVAILABLE HERE:

LINK TO BUY ON AUDIBLE:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Self-Development/A-Short-Course-In-Creative-Writing-Audiobook/B012OVUKE8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1443260320&sr=1-1

LINK TO PAPERBACK ON AMAZON.COM

A Short Course in Creative Writing
by Ms Ruby Allure
Link: http://amzn.com/1517234832

THE LINK TO THE OCEAN CALLINGS: http://www.audible.com/pd/Sci-Fi-Fantasy/The-Ocean-Callings-Audiobook/B01C4OOOEW/

How Close are you to Burn Out?

How close are you to Burn Out?

One of my friends says tooth-pick, chop stick and then 5 foot plank. Why? Well what she is referring to is the signs and subtle messages that give us a clue that something is going on in our bodies. The tooth-pick is ‘a bit of a niggle’ - you notice something but you choose to ignore it because you are soooo busy. In fact, what you might do is ignore any signs until later. That is when the chop-stick makes the signs more obvious, yet still you might just keep trudging on. It might be a pain, a headache or a whole host of tension and that is when the plank smacks you in the face and forces you to stop! Flu? A Migraine? Worse?

 

I am sure that you have noticed that life is getting busier and there is more information to process in all directions. We have emails, calls, texts and deadlines blasting us from all directions and we are always expected to be available. Why is that? Why have we accepted such a precedent? So how long can a nervous system and brain maintain such intense activity without bursting into flames? The answer is different for the individual. Some people are more resilient while others simply drop to the ground when a phone rings. The point that I am trying to make is how one needs to constantly pay attention to the body and how you are feeling. You may simply numb yourself and continue like a martyr. The problem with that is you build up fatigue and that fatigue resides in your body. No matter what you do your energy levels get lower and lower until that dreaded plank hits you with an illness that will stop you leaving your bed.

So…. I am all about solutions and finding easy ways to fit wellbeing into life. So this week I went on a Transcendental meditation course with the meditation trust. I will make this clear, I am not a wafty lettuce sniffing type who wears floaty scarves and belly-dances down the street with my underwear on my head. Although that does sound fun. I might try it sometime and see how the world responds to my new found knicker-head-wear and general jiggling. Anyway, I digress, so I went on this course because my brother recommended it. My brother is a university lecturer, academic and complete rationalist. So when I saw the drop in his shoulders, the general air of relaxation and the decrease in his anxiety then I knew that type of meditation was a good thing.

 

Before I go any further, I have to mention I do meditate. However, I often wander off into a self- amused plane for 20 minutes and then realise I ended up being lulled into thought by giggling at my own jokes. What I needed was a way to stop the inner distraction and TM solved this for me by providing a specific mantra that I could use. Now I don’t know about anyone else, but I often get bored during meditation, woops – it is the truth. There are far more interesting things I could be doing. The mantra combined with the cyclic rhythm enabled me to enter into a very relaxed state. The thing is it was while in this relaxed state that I realised how fatigued I was. After each meditation I would literally pass out and sleep! I did this continually over 3 days. I also had rapid dreams which could be compared to mental Tsunamis or a mental wildebeest stampede. I was astounded. When I talked to the instructor about it he said it was quite usual for people in high powered jobs to respond that way. It was then that I realised that I had probably been close to burn out. My tooth-pick signs were general grumpiness, feelings of general negativity (I am not a negative person) and tiredness, even though I had an excellent diet, sleep well and exercise regularly. The chop-stick signs were – a sty on the eye, a tooth abscess and tension in my shoulders. Luckily I got on this course before the plank came in and smacked me one! Now I am not saying that Transcendental meditation is for everyone; however, it is a great tool to have for life. It enables you to enter deep relaxation and cope with the external stresses of the world and personally found that my energy levels have improved. I will be honest I did not go to the main Transcendental Meditation group instead I went for the Meditation Trust who are cheaper and very grounded. The point that I am trying to make here is that one needs to pay attention to the signs their body is sending them because I honestly had no clue that I was as fatigued as I was. The thing is I was fatigued to the core and there was no escaping it. It then made me think that if I am like this and I do yoga, eat well and exercise then what are other people like? If anything, I hope this article will remind you to notice the signs and find ways to truly relax until to you are forced to rest by a large piece of metaphorical wood colliding with your face.J

 

 

You can find my books at the following link: Ruby Allure books on Audible:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

AUDIBLE BOOK AVAILABLE HERE:

 

LINK TO BUY ON AUDIBLE:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Self-Development/A-Short-Course-In-Creative-Writing-Audiobook/B012OVUKE8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1443260320&sr=1-1

 

LINK TO PAPERBACK ON AMAZON.COM

A Short Course in Creative Writing
by Ms Ruby Allure
Link: http://amzn.com/1517234832

 

 

Satisfaction...

Finding Satisfaction

The quickest way to lead yourself into dissatisfaction is to make comparison. If you think about it, all of us are unique and not one of us is the same so what is the point of making comparison?

One of my friends is working on her ‘grudges’ against people who have more than her. It has been an interesting insight into how she sees things. It seems that what makes her angry is those people who have miraculously large amounts of money arrive in their bank accounts as if by magic. Or people that get free luxury holidays. Obviously from the outside it is relatively amusing watching someone go red in the face over the fact that a friend has been given a free luxury holiday in Australia or Dubai; however, it did get me thinking. Why can’t people be happy for other people’s good? What is the point of jealousy? All of it is a waste of time and energy. When you are throwing yourself into aggravation over someone else’s good then you are not working on your own. I shared this with my friend and asked whether she could compare a bamboo to an oak or a tulip to a rose. She seemed bemused at first and then she realised what I was saying. There is no comparison; what’s more, there will always be someone richer, prettier, fitter, stronger, cleverer – so why are you comparing to them? You are unique and you have your own things that people are comparing to.

 

 

 

For me dissatisfaction is a sad experience, one that I have been working on for a while. It is learning what is it that makes a person feel dissatisfied and why? I realised I was causing my own dissatisfaction by comparing myself to some of the literary greats or the world’s most successful people (quite clearly I may have aspirations of grandeur) and through doing this I was ensuring that I felt bad. The thing is have you noticed that one is more likely to compare to people who have more than you rather than those who have less? Those who have less would be more than grateful for what you have? So how I combatted the comparison / dissatisfaction issue was to really focus on my stuff and when I caught that little voice in my head making comparison, I watched what it was saying and asked myself where the voice had originated. It is fascinating what the inner commentary tells you and what it drives you to do. It is almost manipulative ‘you will only be good enough when…’ 'If you do so and so... have so and so... then life will be so much better.' Then the next chase begins... 

 

 

So why compare? comparison was necessary in primal times to establish your hierarchy within a tribe. Maybe that is why we still do it. The thing is I do not intend to spend my life in a state of dissatisfaction that I have created for myself through comparison. The root cause of the dissatisfaction is comparison so therefore by not comparing and focusing on what you have and what you have achieved then you will experience satisfaction. Give it a try and see what happens.

 

 

 

 

You can find my books at the following link: Ruby Allure books on Audible:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

 

 

 

AUDIBLE BOOK AVAILABLE HERE:

 

LINK TO BUY ON AUDIBLE:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Self-Development/A-Short-Course-In-Creative-Writing-Audiobook/B012OVUKE8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1443260320&sr=1-1

 

LINK TO PAPERBACK ON AMAZON.COM

A Short Course in Creative Writing
by Ms Ruby Allure
Link: http://amzn.com/1517234832