When things don't go quite so smoothly...

When Things Don't Go Quite So Smoothly...

When we hit the metal gate with two kayaks on the roof and listened to the screech of metal being ripped from the roof of my friends' car, I came to the conclusion that random events happen to everyone and not just me. What made it all the more bizarre was that she continued to drive forwards even though we were snagged. When it happened we were in mid-conversation so she just kept going. The thing is people's lives are complex and the most random things happen and it is how we react to them that certainly reveals where a person is in their lives. This little even happened because a group of us were going paddle-boarding and kayaking up a river. My friend and I would usually be on inflatable paddleboards that are stored in the car. It seemed that my friend actually forgot that she had kayaks on her roof and continued to drive when we came up against the barrier. That in itself is a little insight - continuing to drive even though you reach a barrier...

This last few weeks I have been writing a book about paddle-boarding and loving writing it because so many insights come from some of the situations I find myself in when floating on the sea. Take for example the other morning. I had been paddling for hours, completely relaxed and in gentle waves. I then glanced down to see the hugest jelly fish. It was beautiful. In response a jolt of adrenaline shot through me and I prepared to fight or flight. Of course when you go rigid on your board you then become unstable - somewhat like life. I quickly caught my reaction and was like hang on.. You have been paddling for two hours and not even thought about falling in and then one blooming big jelly fish and you become all wobbly - jellified actually. It then occurred to me that we all have incidents in life where surprise jelly fish turn up or there is a collision and in that moment how do we react? At first the jelly fish threw me into instincts and fear... That made me rigid and potentially would throw me in. Yet when I relaxed and rationalised I realised there was no need to fear. Can we apply this way of thinking to life?

So back to the kayak situation - the two kayaks flew backwards off the car and smashed on the ground. The roof-rack was ripped from the roof and smashed down too. So how do you think my friend reacted? She quickly climbed out of the car checked the kayaks were okay and shrugged. 'It's done now.' With that we got the tool box out, mended the roof rack, moved the kayaks and decided to paddle and have a lovely time. That one situation could have escalated into a tandrum-filled drama but it didn't because my friend was in a space where she was relaxed. So this has played on my mind today... It is quite a lovely thing to play on my mind - how we react and how we affect ourselves through those reactions. So say she had grown angry or frustrated then what would have happened? How would that have improved the situation. The situation happened and that was it, so what is it that in our inner worlds that makes a person launch into an absolute break-down when things don't go so smoothly. What if in those moments of fear, aggravation or anguish, we simply stopped and said - you know what it happened now. Let's do something to make it right and not carry the burden of the situation. What about if something rubbish happens you simply say it's done - let's still go and have a nice time.

The thing is that simple situation could have ruined everyone's paddling fun but it didn't we simply had a gorgeous time gliding up and down the river on kayaks and paddleboards. For me that is the joy of it... The beauty and pleasure of being on water, out in nature and with people who simply get on with it when things don't go so smoothly!

Enjoy my books at the following link:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

AUDIBLE LINK: http://www.audible.com/pd/Fiction/Money-Farm-Audiobook/B010BOM9A8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1467218674&sr=1-1

And Then What?

And Then What?

It's a strange question to ask yourself. And then what? There is something a little all over the place about it. The thing is when you reach a goal  that is when you ask the question 'and then what?' This came to me while paddle-boarding the other morning. I woke at 5.30 in the morning and the conditions were perfect. I clambered out of my bed and pumped up the paddleboard and set myself a-float (on the sea) by six. I know... It might be considered a little strange to be out on the water with no one around at that time. Yet strangely I have the most insights and writing inspirations at that time. That morning I did not have a goal, although for a while I had been wanting to achieve the Boscombe Pier to Bournemouth Pier before work. The thought entered my mind but I did not think too much about it. Instead I went into a beautiful paddling rhythm with turquoise waves lifting me on my journey.

I used to dislike waves when I first started paddling because the sneakers usually threw me into freezing cold water. After a few splash downs I got back up and learned to relax into the waves and relax into allowing my body to balance using my hips. This was a huge lesson because I learned that the more I tried to control, and the more rigid I became, then the more likely I would end up submerged. The other side of the paddleboard lesson was learning to relax and go with it. The more relaxed I was then the more effortless the journey was. I simply seemed to glide towards my goal with almost no effort at all. At times I would find myself in a meditative space as the rhythm of the paddle took over. A short while later I would find myself thinking and when I started thinking too much my balance would go. I realised that over-thinking actually affected my balance. I have found that in yoga too. The days where I have been ridiculously busy are the days I can hardly balance on one leg without toppling into my yoga colleagues. Of course I find it hilarious, I don't think the others are quite so amused.

So back to the paddling, the mesmerisation by the pattern on the water and a state of absolute peace and then suddenly I reached my goal. It snuck up on me. All I had to do was enjoy my paddling journey and I would arrive at the destination with a sense of relaxed joy. I wondered what would happen if I applied this attitude to life. If I simply found an enjoyment in all that I did, if I simply pointed myself towards the goal and then immersed myself in each moment of the journey. I found that thought quite profound.

Anyway I turned my board around and found that I started to rush back. I wondered why I was rushing, I could simply relax into the journey and enjoy my return. It was then that it occurred to me how we so often rush. It is such a waste of time rushing because rushing gets something done without any experience of the moment. Where is the enjoyment in that? As I paddled in my serene state I decided to go slower, as slow as I could. It was then I felt completely present. Everything around me was perfect - the sea, the sun, the birds and the empty space. There is a sense of zen that comes from paddling and it revealed itself in that moment. I was back at where I started, I had completely enjoyed two hours of paddling and thought I achieved a goal effortlessly... It was lovely. I then thought well what is next... And then what?

I paddled in and a random chap came running down the beach. He said that paddleboarding looked lovely and he had always wanted to try. He asked me whether it was easy. I replied 'it depends how relaxed you are.' He studied me curiously. I asked him what the time was and I had fifteen minutes so I handed my board and paddle to him and gestured for him to enter the water. He was wearing his jogging wear and was definitely going to get wet. I showed him how to stand up and how to balance. He did as I said and splat. Then splat again and then double splat. I said that he needed to relax and not control the board. He managed to last about a minute before another big splash. He then paddled in. He loved it. He grinned from ear to ear and in that moment he decided he was going to get his own board. We then went our separate ways but before that he asked me out for a coffee to repay my kindness. It was then that I realised the 'And then what...' Once you reach your goal, why not inspire others to reach theirs through 'random acts of kindness?'

Enjoy my books at the following link:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

NEW RELEASE: TINGLE DINGLE AND THE LITTLE MISCHIEFS

 https://www.amazon.com/Tingle-Dingle-Little-Mischiefs-Allure-ebook/dp/B01G9C0XC2?ie=UTF8&keywords=Ruby%20Allure&qid=1465049617&ref_=sr_1_1&sr=8-1

NEW RELEASE: THE HAIRY-LEGGED MYSTERY

https://www.amazon.com/Hairy-Legged-Mystery-Ruby-Allure-ebook/dp/B01G2C0Y9Q?ie=UTF8&qid=1465049724&ref_=sr_1_2&s=digital-text&sr=1-2

Facing Fear

Facing Fear

How much of your life has been dominated by fear? How often does fear step in and say ‘no don’t – it will make you look a fool or it is dangerous?’ Imagine if fear had turned up as you entered the birth canal. Imagine if it say – ‘no don't! - It's dangerous out there and that birth canal can squash your head. It is better that you stay in here, it is warm, it is safe.’ Hmmm and that is the moment life truly begins. We have the courage to be squashed and released into the world to experience life and what an experience it is. The thing is we all experience situations or circumstances that hurt us and we develop fears. Those fears accumulate over a life time. They make are concerned, they protect us but irrational fears inhibit us.

Now the reason that I write this is that while I was on holiday  in Thailand and faced one of my greatest fears, that fear had been caused by an incident 15 years ago. So let me give you an insight: it was 2001 Egypt, Sharm El Sheik to be exact. I had just completed my PADI open water diving exam and passed (yippee). Anyway my first dive as a diver proved to be an experience that I would not wish on anyone. While I was about fourteen meters down my air cut out. My buddy was a little ahead of me and it was at a time when there was not a spare breathing piece on each tank. At the time I knew that if I panicked it would result in death. I calmly swam to my buddy and let him know and we shared air and gradually ascended to the surface. However, I was concerned his air would run out too. The chatter inside my head went completely loopy saying things like ‘see don’t put yourself in danger.’ ‘You knew this would happen…’ Then the cycles of negative thoughts played round and round. Anyway we surfaced and made it back to the boat. I then heard tales where there had been far worse repercussions. After that experience was it a surprise that I did not go diving again?

So last week I was in Thailand with a great friend of mine who at the age of 56 is retraining as a dive instructor. This woman’s attitude to life is inspirational and nothing is impossible. She teaches people to fly gliders. So as part of our holiday we popped into a dive shop to arrange her next dive. She turned to me and said I am surprised you haven’t done your diving exams since you surf, paddleboard, row and basically want to be a mermaid. I said that I had and said I had lost my diving card. Well the chap typed in my name into the computer and there I was – PADI registered. I just needed to do a refresher. It was at that moment that I thought well I can run away from this or I can face this fear. I explained what had happened and that I had not dived since. The chap  was surprised and very sympathetic and said that he would make sure that I was given the most experienced and empathetic instructor.

The next day I went through my refresher and faced my fears, faced the voices of complete terror in my head and had the most spectacular dive. It was beautiful, I wondered why I had waited so long. The whole experience made me contemplate fear and its uses. It protects us, it keeps us safe and stops us sticking wet fingers in plug sockets. Yet there are other times it holds us back in life. It stops us truly experiencing. It also reveals the conversations in our heads that limit us. Now the funny thing was the night before the dive I asked myself the likelihood of the same situation repeating itself… If it did it would be uncanny. I also read the whole PADI open water  book in an evening. I then noticed that each breathing set had two mouth pieces. I would be diving with two people and an instructor - that in itself gave me three options if things went wrong. I have to say I felt much better once I had rationalised it all. I did email my parents and brother and told them I loved them just in case my number was up. It was not and I now love diving again!

With all the above in mind, what are your fears? What are you avoiding experiencing in life because of fear? What are the fears and how will you face them? I have to say by facing that fear I felt liberated and realised there was so much potential to experience. I then considered what other fears I should face. I then remembered that I had not been horse riding since my horse bolted and threw me onto an electric fence… Oh dear!

You can find my books at the following link: Ruby Allure books on Audible:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

The one that is making a big impression at the moment is MONEY FARM

LINK: http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_mn_mt_ano_tseft__galileo?advsearchKeywords=money+farm&x=0&y=0

Written by: Ruby Allure

Narrated by: Helen Lloyd

Length: 14 hrs and 6 mins 

Unabridged Audiobook

Release Date:06-25-15

Publisher: Ruby Allure

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4.70 (3 ratings)

How do you feel about the value of your life being based on the amount of money sitting in your bank? If we are all inter-connected by money, then why do so few people pay attention to how money works? Fear and denial are perfect for generating debt and that is what the world is run on. Now imagine, if in the future, one financial institution became so powerful that it could choose to eradicate the present monetary system. Then what happens?

LINK: http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_mn_mt_ano_tseft__galileo?advsearchKeywords=money+farm&x=0&y=0

AUDIBLE BOOK AVAILABLE HERE:

LINK TO BUY ON AUDIBLE:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Self-Development/A-Short-Course-In-Creative-Writing-Audiobook/B012OVUKE8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1443260320&sr=1-1

LINK TO PAPERBACK ON AMAZON.COM

A Short Course in Creative Writing
by Ms Ruby Allure
Link: http://amzn.com/1517234832

THE LINK TO THE OCEAN CALLINGS: http://www.audible.com/pd/Sci-Fi-Fantasy/The-Ocean-Callings-Audiobook/B01C4OOOEW/

 

 

http://www.audible.com/pd/Fiction/Love-Hunt-Dating-Game-Audiobook/B015G4ICYA/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srImg?qid=1448187651&sr=1-1

Come on admit it - as much as we deny it - we ladies like a good love hunt.

We have tick lists, ideals, and we hunt in high-heeled packs. Of course, we're all hunting for that elusive right man who ticks every box and even has tidy nostril hair. Okay maybe not you, but you know other ladies who love the hunt.

Well, it's time for Eva and Gracie to love hunt, and their "targets" are rich men - the golden sperm. Such exciting escapades would provide the pair with entertaining discussions during their dull office hours - or so they thought. What they did not anticipate was the discovery of the "booby man"; humorous but very hard truths about wealth, themselves, power; and the RichIdiot.com phenomenon.

The question remains: can love really be hunted?

 

 

http://www.audible.com/pd/Fiction/Love-Hunt-II-The-Love-Game-Audiobook/B0176Z9Y08/ref=a_search_c4_1_7_srImg?qid=1448187651&sr=1-7

The Love Hunt has returned. Gracie is back on the dating horse after a huge fall in her first tick-list-tastic love hunt.

Her new dating adventures take her and Eva into the depths of "the love game".

In the meantime, Eva, the ultimate Russian gold digger, has come to the conclusion that her poor "village idiot boyfriend" will never be enough. He will certainly not pay off her accumulating debts. She needs a rich man, and that means rich idiot dating.

In The Love Game, Eva and Gracie travel the journey of extreme love learning. On the way, they will discover their love and lust lists, their intrinsic issues, and experience some hilarious and jaw-dropping dates in pursuit of the wealthy ideal.

All of this in the pursuit of love.

The Love Hunt II is on!

It is TIME for YOU TIME!

You Time…

 

Is it really that indulgent to have time by yourself? To spend time alone and allow yourself the time to process your life and your experiences?  The thing is life gains momentum and becomes busier and busier. There is more to experience, more to distract yourself with, more social media than you can shake a stick at and more on the to do list than can be ticked. No matter how tick-tastic you are there is always more ticks to be added to the list. This seems to be how life has become and amongst the endless treadmill of experience and things to do – when do you allow yourself to be bored or to simply dream.

 

 

It was over the last few months that I realised that I was running on the fastest speed of the mental treadmill. I worked full time, in the evenings I listened and edited my audio books whilst writing my next book, socialising, promoting and marketing. All of this gradually became overwhelming to the point where I was becoming moody. There were endless appointments coming in and I found myself booked up for three months. The prospect of that made me feel like crying. I had stopped enjoying being out with people, instead I just wanted to get it over and done with. In my moments between blogging, writing, promoting and doing spreadsheets I would manage to fit in a bit of nutrition. It then occurred to me that I was not the only person who was living a life like this. Most of my friends were. In addition, some had weddings to organise and children to juggle. They were all running at full speed through life.

 

 

Last week I went to a baby blessing, a lovely event out in the forest with my best friend. Towards the end of the picnic she turned to me with an expression that revealed she was ecstatic but worn out. She stared me in the eyes and said ‘I NEED A TWILIGHT SPA!’ she didn’t care how much it cost, but she simply needed five hours out of the endless race that she felt she was competing against herself in. Her desperate need for time out triggered something in me because by the end of that weekend I had listened to 30 hours of my audio books and by Monday I was just ‘done’. Even though I had achieved a monumental feat I was moody and grizzly. It was then that I realised that I had had enough. I needed quiet time and I needed to schedule it in. So where was there space? I looked at my diary and realised that evenings were filled. Work had to be produced and the only time I could make me time was from 6 in the morning until 7.30. It was then that I decided that me time involved doing something I loved. I needed to start the day with something that inspired me and took me out of my mind back into body.

 

 

After a bit of thinking I came to a conclusion and I began stand up paddle boarding before work. Sitting watching sunrise on the sea from a stand up paddleboard really puts everything in perspective. There you are in a vast natural open space bobbing about like a small cork. The act of stand up paddle boarding takes you out of your head and back into body. For the first time in ages I felt connected and not in a mental and physical churn. Admittedly many people consider getting up so early madness, yet it is what I needed. My state of mind has shifted from churn to calm and the generated anxiety has stopped turning up. Now, from a calm and removed perspective, I can see how many people need the space for them but never quite find the space. When you don’t have that space to process your thoughts and experience you find that you are on a slippery road to burn out. I could see that I was heading in that fiery direction. So today I wanted to write about the fact that finding space to come out of the mind and be in a physical space through yoga, meditation, paddle boarding or simply journaling has to be one of the best things for you. Otherwise one builds resentment and time, the new wealth, feels as though it flies by. So my question is why do so many think it is indulgent to have time for yourself…  Time to be with you because then you will have more to give others.

 

 

LINK TO MONEY FARM:

 http://www.audible.com.au/pd/Fiction/Money-Farm-Audiobook/B010BKZK5I

"Smartly Written, Thought Provoking Read!"

Narration - Helen Lloyd - Kick A$$!
Really Great Narration - Brits and Aussies and Germans and more. Lovely voice to listen to and she even captured the rather robotic nature of the cult-like members of the Money Farm.

This is a really terrific book - and is it bad that for the majority of the book I was thinking "sign me up!" (or at least sign up one of my grand-kids and let me move into one of the retirement neighborhoods).

The Money's are all 'their best selves' due to the nutrition and fitness requirements along with a few other treatments along the way which are tailored to each individual and allow them to reach their full potential. All their needs are met, they have no debts, no worries, they are appreciated and they all live in really nice digs. (like I said...sign me up!)

It's a smartly written and thought provoking book of a Dystopian/Eutopian society where our heroine Jyllian finds her-self jobless with her savings running out. She ends up being selected to join the M.O.N.E.Y.'s as a "breaker" because of her intelligent & rebellious way of thinking. She is to challenge their systems and find ways to break them, all in the name of making them better.

The story follows her and a few other select characters through their introduction to Money, their training, their indoctrination and ultimately through their discovery of what Money's goals really are.

I can't really say much more without giving away too much, but I thought it was a really terrific book. It was hard for me to 'get into it' in the beginning, but I plan to listen to the start again.

It's smartly written and filled with intricate details about these two "worlds". Really an interesting book about the state of the worlds finances! Loved it! I'm actually stunned that I'm only the second review of this book on Goodreads. READ or LISTEN to it! It's a keeper!

I received a copy of this audiobook free of charge from Audiobookblast in exchange for an unbiased review.