Facing Fear

Facing Fear

How much of your life has been dominated by fear? How often does fear step in and say ‘no don’t – it will make you look a fool or it is dangerous?’ Imagine if fear had turned up as you entered the birth canal. Imagine if it say – ‘no don't! - It's dangerous out there and that birth canal can squash your head. It is better that you stay in here, it is warm, it is safe.’ Hmmm and that is the moment life truly begins. We have the courage to be squashed and released into the world to experience life and what an experience it is. The thing is we all experience situations or circumstances that hurt us and we develop fears. Those fears accumulate over a life time. They make are concerned, they protect us but irrational fears inhibit us.

Now the reason that I write this is that while I was on holiday  in Thailand and faced one of my greatest fears, that fear had been caused by an incident 15 years ago. So let me give you an insight: it was 2001 Egypt, Sharm El Sheik to be exact. I had just completed my PADI open water diving exam and passed (yippee). Anyway my first dive as a diver proved to be an experience that I would not wish on anyone. While I was about fourteen meters down my air cut out. My buddy was a little ahead of me and it was at a time when there was not a spare breathing piece on each tank. At the time I knew that if I panicked it would result in death. I calmly swam to my buddy and let him know and we shared air and gradually ascended to the surface. However, I was concerned his air would run out too. The chatter inside my head went completely loopy saying things like ‘see don’t put yourself in danger.’ ‘You knew this would happen…’ Then the cycles of negative thoughts played round and round. Anyway we surfaced and made it back to the boat. I then heard tales where there had been far worse repercussions. After that experience was it a surprise that I did not go diving again?

So last week I was in Thailand with a great friend of mine who at the age of 56 is retraining as a dive instructor. This woman’s attitude to life is inspirational and nothing is impossible. She teaches people to fly gliders. So as part of our holiday we popped into a dive shop to arrange her next dive. She turned to me and said I am surprised you haven’t done your diving exams since you surf, paddleboard, row and basically want to be a mermaid. I said that I had and said I had lost my diving card. Well the chap typed in my name into the computer and there I was – PADI registered. I just needed to do a refresher. It was at that moment that I thought well I can run away from this or I can face this fear. I explained what had happened and that I had not dived since. The chap  was surprised and very sympathetic and said that he would make sure that I was given the most experienced and empathetic instructor.

The next day I went through my refresher and faced my fears, faced the voices of complete terror in my head and had the most spectacular dive. It was beautiful, I wondered why I had waited so long. The whole experience made me contemplate fear and its uses. It protects us, it keeps us safe and stops us sticking wet fingers in plug sockets. Yet there are other times it holds us back in life. It stops us truly experiencing. It also reveals the conversations in our heads that limit us. Now the funny thing was the night before the dive I asked myself the likelihood of the same situation repeating itself… If it did it would be uncanny. I also read the whole PADI open water  book in an evening. I then noticed that each breathing set had two mouth pieces. I would be diving with two people and an instructor - that in itself gave me three options if things went wrong. I have to say I felt much better once I had rationalised it all. I did email my parents and brother and told them I loved them just in case my number was up. It was not and I now love diving again!

With all the above in mind, what are your fears? What are you avoiding experiencing in life because of fear? What are the fears and how will you face them? I have to say by facing that fear I felt liberated and realised there was so much potential to experience. I then considered what other fears I should face. I then remembered that I had not been horse riding since my horse bolted and threw me onto an electric fence… Oh dear!

You can find my books at the following link: Ruby Allure books on Audible:

http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_hp_tseft?advsearchKeywords=Ruby+allure&filterby=field-keywords&x=0&y=0

The one that is making a big impression at the moment is MONEY FARM

LINK: http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_mn_mt_ano_tseft__galileo?advsearchKeywords=money+farm&x=0&y=0

Written by: Ruby Allure

Narrated by: Helen Lloyd

Length: 14 hrs and 6 mins 

Unabridged Audiobook

Release Date:06-25-15

Publisher: Ruby Allure

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4.70 (3 ratings)

How do you feel about the value of your life being based on the amount of money sitting in your bank? If we are all inter-connected by money, then why do so few people pay attention to how money works? Fear and denial are perfect for generating debt and that is what the world is run on. Now imagine, if in the future, one financial institution became so powerful that it could choose to eradicate the present monetary system. Then what happens?

LINK: http://www.audible.com/search/ref=a_mn_mt_ano_tseft__galileo?advsearchKeywords=money+farm&x=0&y=0

AUDIBLE BOOK AVAILABLE HERE:

LINK TO BUY ON AUDIBLE:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Self-Development/A-Short-Course-In-Creative-Writing-Audiobook/B012OVUKE8/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1443260320&sr=1-1

LINK TO PAPERBACK ON AMAZON.COM

A Short Course in Creative Writing
by Ms Ruby Allure
Link: http://amzn.com/1517234832

THE LINK TO THE OCEAN CALLINGS: http://www.audible.com/pd/Sci-Fi-Fantasy/The-Ocean-Callings-Audiobook/B01C4OOOEW/

 

 

http://www.audible.com/pd/Fiction/Love-Hunt-Dating-Game-Audiobook/B015G4ICYA/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srImg?qid=1448187651&sr=1-1

Come on admit it - as much as we deny it - we ladies like a good love hunt.

We have tick lists, ideals, and we hunt in high-heeled packs. Of course, we're all hunting for that elusive right man who ticks every box and even has tidy nostril hair. Okay maybe not you, but you know other ladies who love the hunt.

Well, it's time for Eva and Gracie to love hunt, and their "targets" are rich men - the golden sperm. Such exciting escapades would provide the pair with entertaining discussions during their dull office hours - or so they thought. What they did not anticipate was the discovery of the "booby man"; humorous but very hard truths about wealth, themselves, power; and the RichIdiot.com phenomenon.

The question remains: can love really be hunted?

 

 

http://www.audible.com/pd/Fiction/Love-Hunt-II-The-Love-Game-Audiobook/B0176Z9Y08/ref=a_search_c4_1_7_srImg?qid=1448187651&sr=1-7

The Love Hunt has returned. Gracie is back on the dating horse after a huge fall in her first tick-list-tastic love hunt.

Her new dating adventures take her and Eva into the depths of "the love game".

In the meantime, Eva, the ultimate Russian gold digger, has come to the conclusion that her poor "village idiot boyfriend" will never be enough. He will certainly not pay off her accumulating debts. She needs a rich man, and that means rich idiot dating.

In The Love Game, Eva and Gracie travel the journey of extreme love learning. On the way, they will discover their love and lust lists, their intrinsic issues, and experience some hilarious and jaw-dropping dates in pursuit of the wealthy ideal.

All of this in the pursuit of love.

The Love Hunt II is on!

Need some motivation?

Well this is it... There is a tremendous sense of achievement when a person starts with nothing... When I say nothing - never heard of, never known and literally stands at the base of a mountain and thinks - how on earth does anyone ascend such a monster? Obviously that is metaphorical mountain and we all have mountains in our lives to climb. That is probably why we chose to live: to learn, to experience, to grow and be challenged. Or it might be to arrive in the world and buy things and die. It simply depends which school of thought you are in... and whether the conditioning has paid off.

Anyway I deviate. In the school of writing there are only seven narratives and one of these is rags to riches. Again this is metaphorical, it does not necessarily have to do with money. Instead it is associated with starting at nothing - this could be knowledge, experience or actual poverty and through the narrative the 'hero / heroine' develop and become rich. Again this may well be in experience, wisdom or physical wealth. The point is that from nothing something is made. It is the sense of transformation and metamorphosis on the journey that gives the pleasure. Have you ever noticed that you set yourself a goal and that goal enables you to grow, expand and challenge yourself? You then hit the goal and yes you are elated and this elation is short-lived because now you have reached a plateaux and it is time for a new challenge - one that is bigger, better and more challenging.

 

So you may wonder why I write this - it is simple - I feel the need to inspire others. When you are daunted and doubt that you will make it - keep going.  Notice the voice in your head that says you are being ridiculous and thank it. That being ridiculous is a path to change and growth. When everyone tells you why you can't do it - well show they why YOU can. There are so many times on a journey when you desire to give up and all hope feels lost. It is at that point something seems to be testing you and asking you 'how much do you really want it?' It is at this moment you make your decision. Give up and never know or persevere. Well I can tell you 12 years later perseverance paid off. From nothing my books became something and if I can do it... I know others can. Follow your passion and intuition because a desire or a compulsion to contribute is there for a reason. Secretly you know YOUR own reason for doing something. Why don't you let go of your reasons why not and say 'give it a go - in fact give it your best go!'

Ruby

LINK TO MY BOOKS :
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Ruby-Allure/e/B00M9Y4GAA/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1447793190&sr=8-1

 
 
 

To Listen on audio:

http://www.audible.com/pd/Fiction/Love-Hunt-II-The-Love-Game-Audiobook/B0176Z9Y08/ref=a_search_c4_1_1_srTtl?qid=1447097231&sr=1-1

The paperback on Amazon:

http://www.amazon.com/Love-Hunt-II-Richidiot-com-dating/dp/1517542316/ref=la_B00M9Y4GAA_1_3?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1447096640&sr=1-3

 

 

 

Dealing with Distraction

Dealing with Distraction

 

Focus and distraction sit at opposite ends of the scale in terms of productivity. However, as life increases pace our attention span decreases. With the continued increase of gadgets, devices, emails and phone calls is it any surprise our capacity to focus is becoming increasingly limited? Now, I remember a lecturer at university advising me when making a presentation; make sure you break it up because the maximum attention span a fellow student has is twenty minutes. I remember thinking ‘only twenty minutes?’ until I researched the average attention span in 2015 and look at this:

 

·         In 2000 the average attention span in humans was 12 seconds

·         In 2015 the average attention span in humans is 8.25 seconds

·         In 2030 will the average attention span for humans be 4 seconds?

·         In 2000 the average attention span of a gold fish 9 seconds

·         In 2015 The average attention span of a goldfish 9 seconds

·         In 2030 the predicted average attention span of a goldfish 9 seconds

Does anyone feel a little concerned?

 

I thought I would then research a few statistics regarding attention span taken from the Statistic Brain Research Institute:

 

·         25% of teenagers measured forgot major details of close friends and relatives

·         7% of people measured had forgotten their own birthdays (some on more than one occasion)

·         30 times per hour is the average amount of times an office worker checks their mail

·         150 times per day is the average amount of times that mobile users check their phones

·         60% of disruptions come from email and phone calls

So with all this to distract us then how do we focus?

 

·         The first thing to do is become aware of our distraction habits. What is it that distracts us and how regularly does it happen?

·         On the other side of distraction ask yourself when do you focus?

·         What makes it easy for you to focus?

 

 

In Zen, concentrated focus is known as ‘flow’.

 

·         What is the easiest way for you to achieve your optimum state of flow?

·         What is your optimum time for flowing?

·         When you have worked out what works for you then do you notice a pattern?

·         With flow in mind, can you break your work down into regular periods of flow?

 

The five best pieces of focus and anti-distraction advice:

·         Make a list and be deliberate in all that you do

·         Make self-imposed deadlines. Set your self a realistic time limit to complete a task and do it in that time. Bear in mind Parkinson’s Law where work expands to fill the time available for its completion

·         Don’t always be available and find ways of being unavailable until you achieve what you need to do

·         Reward yourself with a break once you have completed a task
 

·         Apply the two minute rule: If you have available time and can do something in two minutes then get it done and out of the way as soon as it arrives

 

To explore your creative side - try this on audible:)
 

AUDIBLE LINK FOR A SHORT COURSE IN CREATIVE WRITING: http://amzn.com/B01390THLK

 

21/08/15

 

"An Unexpected Gem"

***I was provided a copy of this audio book for the purpose of a review ***

With the required disclaimer out of the way, let me be brutally honest, I had not expected this little gem. In fact, I had expected my listening would be a bit rough and was fortified by it being less than 2 hours.

The synopsis says the author wrote the book as a takeaway from her evening classes on creative writing. My mental context was ... Community Ed evening classes ...and expected a well intended but kind of amateur product. However, I am interested in adult education, and batter my own nerd head against a giant personal creativity brick wall.

So you have an idea of my mind set... low expectations along with high interest.

Amateur hour it was NOT.

I don't know where the author teaches her class, but Sign Me Up! And bring the narrator. Wow. Two hours of unadulterated, straight up, right on, good learning material delivered by a close friend just sharing the material. The narrator's voice was warm, sincere without any artifact or pompous patronising, and well modulated throughout. The material was mind opening for me, with the right mix of the mechanics of writing exercises, sufficient context that using prompts now makes sense to me, and a sprinkling of the inner heart work of creativity through written material.

This was just what I didn't dare hope for in a how to creative writing listen.

Truly an unexpected gem and a learning and growing experience for me.

A keeper and one I will return to many times as I deconstruct my own wall, one block at a time.

Thank You, Ruby and Thank You, Erin.

 

TO BUY MONEY FARM ON AMAZON.com http://amzn.com/B010F04W9O

· Frode

06/08/15

5 STAR

So Money Farm by Ruby Allure was a surprise! When I REALLY did not read things about this book I review for Audiobook Blast, I sometimes get books I don't know something about. BTW: I read 99% about the books I want to review, but this book I can't remember I did that for. Anyways: This was a nice surprise, and I think it is one of those books that is better the second time you read it. No joke! I listen to this twice before I made this! Money Farm makes you thin, and who does not like to hear a book that makes you think? It is an awesome book, that I will recommend to all that likes audiobooks, and really to people that does not!

Helen Lloyd English accent its the topic like a glow and a hand! Her "lady like" voice is so cold, and clear I feel that the author made this book thinking that Helen Lloyd would read it out loud! That is how I feel those two fits together! The 2 times 14 hrs and 6 mins I spend with her never feels boring or uninteresting! I would love to spend it again, and I will because this book I will hear again, and again, even when it is 14 hrs and 6 mins long! That is saying something!

I was provided this audiobook at no charge by the author, publisher and/or narrator in exchange for an unbiased review via AudiobookBlast dot com

MONEY FARM

· "Incredibly thought provoking..."

What did you like most about Money Farm?

It was an eye opener.

 

What did you like best about this story?

I like the way it made you think about the way normal everyday life is here and now, and the future...

 

Have you listened to any of Helen Lloyd’s other performances? How does this one compare?

Helen Lloyd narrated this fairly long audiobook brilliantly. Although the story content was very intense and thought provoking, her lovely smooth voice was very easy to listen to and I thought it was just perfect, a fascinating book wonderfully narrated.

 

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

Yes it was, although it is too long to do so.